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A Guide to Commonly Used Terms on "Dating" Sites
Sep. 18th, 2009 | 08:42 pm
Location: Home
Sensation: 
bitchy
Recently got back into the er... game. Was pretty baffled by all the nonsense people spout these days. If you're like me, I hope you find this to be helpful. LOL
P.S Sorry if this is offensive to anyone. It's purely tongue in cheek!
A Guide to Commonly Used Terms on "Dating" Sites
================================
1. STRAIGHT-ACTING = Remembers to lock his wrist every once in a while. Also believes that using the term "Dude!" in conversations makes him sound "man". Can be found hanging out with "TOP".
2. GYM-BOD = Commutes between home and gym everyday.
3. BUFFED = Steroid-induced pecs and abs. Knows all sources of good protein. A dinner date with him will probably see only you eating while he helpfully tells you the amount of calories and fats in between bites.
4. NO EFFEMS/CROSS DRESSERS = Only one bitch in a relationship at a time. In this case, it's him. See "BOTTOM".
5. MSN ME = Wishes to monopolize your time online.
6. I'M NOT EASY TO GET = He is, but he believes this makes him sound less needy.
7. FUN-LOVING = I'm here for sex.
8. HANDSOME GUYS ONLY = Been told since he was 3 what a God's gift to women everywhere he ws by his doting mother. Also firmly believes he's too good for YOU.
9. JUST HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS = I'm here for sex but I'm discreet.
10. TOP = Believes that being a bottom makes him too gay. See "STRAIGHT ACTING".
11. BOTTOM = Only son / had sisters and female cousins only for company when growing up.
12. I'M NICE = Has absolutely nothing to contribute to a conversation. Be prepared to monologue by yourself.
13. I'M BAD = Believes that having sex in the living room/kitchen is the height of hedonism.
14. I AM ATTACHED = Cannot be seen in public with you.
15. I LOVE TO TRAVEL = Cabin crew.
16. IF YOU'RE NOT CUTE, DONT EVEN BOTHER = Looking for more glamour-shots type of profile to add to his Facebook / MySpace / Friendster.
17. I AM SENSITIVE, LOVING, CARING AND HONEST = Above 45years in age. Probably came out to himself after his failed 2nd marriage. Still hopes it might not be too late.
18. I GIVE GOOD MASSAGE = Orchard Towers masseur looking to do freelance on the sideline.
19. NO PIC, NO REPLY = Believes he's God's gift to gay men everywhere with a self proclaimed Simon Cowell personality.. See "HANDSOME GUYS ONLY".
20. DISCREET = Attached and looking to have one-night-stands on the side. See "I AM ATTACHED".
21. CURIOUS STRAIGHT MALE = Dead fish in bed. Be prepared to do ALL the work.
22. SWIM-BOD = Former GYM-BOD.
23.FUN-SEEKING = Disease carrier. See also "FUN-LOVING".
24. QUIET AND SOFT-SPOKEN = Closeted freak who is so paranoid at home, he believes that answering a phone call could out him. See "STRAIGHT-ACTING" and "TOP".
25. MACHO = Closeted BOTTOM.
26. HOMEBODY = Free-loading bum who's occupation has never stated anything other than "Unemployed".
27. OUT-GOING PERSONALITY = Flaming queen.
28. I DONT LIKE CASUAL SEX = Attached feller who wants a regular fuckbuddy. See also "DISCREET".
29. LOOKING FOR A SOULMATE = Late teens / early 20s who's watched Sex and the City way too many times.
30. I AM NOT HANDSOME = Definitely thinks he is but believes this makes him sound modest. See "HANDSOME GUYS ONLY".
31. I'M HANDSOME, INTELLIGENT, GORGEOUS = Purchased a makeover package recently and believes that's all that it takes.
32. SHY TYPE = See " I AM SENSITIVE, LOVING, CARING AND HONEST" and "CURIOUS STRAIGHT MALE".
33. I’M SENSIBLE = Expect to go dutch on dates. Clashes with "HOMEBODY".
34. I’M NOT JUST INTERESTED IN SEX = Utterly tired of getting rejected.
35. BISEXUAL = Dead fish in bed, but can be persuaded to give a blowjob. For like 45secs.
36. BOYTOY = Over 30s, desperate to be young again.
37. NATURE-LOVER = Doesn't have his own place, may have to do "it" in a deserted park/ under the flyover at Fort Road / East Coast public restrooms if you don't either.
38. HEALTHY INDIVIDUAL = Has every supplement product from GNC & Nature's Farm.
39. EXECUTIVE TYPE = Doesn't own a gym membership.
40. TYPICAL GUY = Totally boring on a date, fucks like a jackrabbit and falls sleep right after he ejaculates.
41. I AM SENSITIVE = Desperately seeking a relationship. Would sms you "miss you" and "love you" after the first date. Believes sex = marriage.
42. I HAVE A WONDERFUL MIND = His excuse for why he's THAT fat. See also "EXECUTIVE TYPE".
43. I AM THE LIFE OF THE PARTY = Party-scene queen. Never home on Friday, Saturday AND Sunday nights before 4am. See also "OUTGOING PERSONALITY".
44. DECENT GUY = Over 40s living with his parents, firmly believes his family still thinks he's straight.
45. I AM FUNNY = Watches sitcoms and laughs along with the laughter tracks. See "I'M NICE".
46. PURE TOP = Been discovered to have a "chocolate berry" once when he was bottom and never got over the embarassment.
P.S Sorry if this is offensive to anyone. It's purely tongue in cheek!
A Guide to Commonly Used Terms on "Dating" Sites
================================
1. STRAIGHT-ACTING = Remembers to lock his wrist every once in a while. Also believes that using the term "Dude!" in conversations makes him sound "man". Can be found hanging out with "TOP".
2. GYM-BOD = Commutes between home and gym everyday.
3. BUFFED = Steroid-induced pecs and abs. Knows all sources of good protein. A dinner date with him will probably see only you eating while he helpfully tells you the amount of calories and fats in between bites.
4. NO EFFEMS/CROSS DRESSERS = Only one bitch in a relationship at a time. In this case, it's him. See "BOTTOM".
5. MSN ME = Wishes to monopolize your time online.
6. I'M NOT EASY TO GET = He is, but he believes this makes him sound less needy.
7. FUN-LOVING = I'm here for sex.
8. HANDSOME GUYS ONLY = Been told since he was 3 what a God's gift to women everywhere he ws by his doting mother. Also firmly believes he's too good for YOU.
9. JUST HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS = I'm here for sex but I'm discreet.
10. TOP = Believes that being a bottom makes him too gay. See "STRAIGHT ACTING".
11. BOTTOM = Only son / had sisters and female cousins only for company when growing up.
12. I'M NICE = Has absolutely nothing to contribute to a conversation. Be prepared to monologue by yourself.
13. I'M BAD = Believes that having sex in the living room/kitchen is the height of hedonism.
14. I AM ATTACHED = Cannot be seen in public with you.
15. I LOVE TO TRAVEL = Cabin crew.
16. IF YOU'RE NOT CUTE, DONT EVEN BOTHER = Looking for more glamour-shots type of profile to add to his Facebook / MySpace / Friendster.
17. I AM SENSITIVE, LOVING, CARING AND HONEST = Above 45years in age. Probably came out to himself after his failed 2nd marriage. Still hopes it might not be too late.
18. I GIVE GOOD MASSAGE = Orchard Towers masseur looking to do freelance on the sideline.
19. NO PIC, NO REPLY = Believes he's God's gift to gay men everywhere with a self proclaimed Simon Cowell personality.. See "HANDSOME GUYS ONLY".
20. DISCREET = Attached and looking to have one-night-stands on the side. See "I AM ATTACHED".
21. CURIOUS STRAIGHT MALE = Dead fish in bed. Be prepared to do ALL the work.
22. SWIM-BOD = Former GYM-BOD.
23.FUN-SEEKING = Disease carrier. See also "FUN-LOVING".
24. QUIET AND SOFT-SPOKEN = Closeted freak who is so paranoid at home, he believes that answering a phone call could out him. See "STRAIGHT-ACTING" and "TOP".
25. MACHO = Closeted BOTTOM.
26. HOMEBODY = Free-loading bum who's occupation has never stated anything other than "Unemployed".
27. OUT-GOING PERSONALITY = Flaming queen.
28. I DONT LIKE CASUAL SEX = Attached feller who wants a regular fuckbuddy. See also "DISCREET".
29. LOOKING FOR A SOULMATE = Late teens / early 20s who's watched Sex and the City way too many times.
30. I AM NOT HANDSOME = Definitely thinks he is but believes this makes him sound modest. See "HANDSOME GUYS ONLY".
31. I'M HANDSOME, INTELLIGENT, GORGEOUS = Purchased a makeover package recently and believes that's all that it takes.
32. SHY TYPE = See " I AM SENSITIVE, LOVING, CARING AND HONEST" and "CURIOUS STRAIGHT MALE".
33. I’M SENSIBLE = Expect to go dutch on dates. Clashes with "HOMEBODY".
34. I’M NOT JUST INTERESTED IN SEX = Utterly tired of getting rejected.
35. BISEXUAL = Dead fish in bed, but can be persuaded to give a blowjob. For like 45secs.
36. BOYTOY = Over 30s, desperate to be young again.
37. NATURE-LOVER = Doesn't have his own place, may have to do "it" in a deserted park/ under the flyover at Fort Road / East Coast public restrooms if you don't either.
38. HEALTHY INDIVIDUAL = Has every supplement product from GNC & Nature's Farm.
39. EXECUTIVE TYPE = Doesn't own a gym membership.
40. TYPICAL GUY = Totally boring on a date, fucks like a jackrabbit and falls sleep right after he ejaculates.
41. I AM SENSITIVE = Desperately seeking a relationship. Would sms you "miss you" and "love you" after the first date. Believes sex = marriage.
42. I HAVE A WONDERFUL MIND = His excuse for why he's THAT fat. See also "EXECUTIVE TYPE".
43. I AM THE LIFE OF THE PARTY = Party-scene queen. Never home on Friday, Saturday AND Sunday nights before 4am. See also "OUTGOING PERSONALITY".
44. DECENT GUY = Over 40s living with his parents, firmly believes his family still thinks he's straight.
45. I AM FUNNY = Watches sitcoms and laughs along with the laughter tracks. See "I'M NICE".
46. PURE TOP = Been discovered to have a "chocolate berry" once when he was bottom and never got over the embarassment.
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For The Little Lock On The Hill
May. 25th, 2009 | 05:14 am
Location: Home
Sensation: 
sad
I was browsing one of the warlock forums I go to, when a post by the site's moderator caught my eye.
It was a tribute to "the little lock on the hill", a personal account by another warlock player 2 years ago this day (May 24 2007).
When I first read his account, I blinked, then started tearing.
This is the post the original poster, Tanorthewarlock from US Azgalor server, made on The Warlocks Den forums.
http://wowmb.net/forums/f20/15342-my_li
"Well...how to start? By getting to the point i guess...my nephew who is 7 years old pasted away today. As i sit the tears have already started to roll. But i wanted to tell you of his level 11 gnome warlock on my account,also on my sever.
He has spent 4 days 7 hrs and some change playing. Alot of time to be only level 11 huh? Well, the first day we played he wanted to make a toon like mine but he wanted his to be "little like him,so he made a gnome. And i was all over him the first few hours...with,"no go over here"" no, you want to wear those pants they are better than yours" " "no, the deer dont give you experence" "why are you going to kill those level 3 kobalds again?"
To which many of his answers where, " i like hearing those guys say "you no take candle" to which he would squeel. As for the pants he just didnt like them,he kept his pants he got in the begining. Said they were his lucky pants. He said his imp liked eating the deer,to which i would be like "no...they dont eat the deer".He would see how long it took him to get thru that cave of kobalds over and over and over again.
After all my "advice" and suggestion on "spell rotations" and how to use his imp effectivly, he told me that a game should be fun and everything i told him was confusing and made his head hurt.
From that day foward i let him do whatever he wanted as long as he wanted to. He loved killing kobalds, running around trees, killing cows, and playing his lock the way he wanted to,even if uncle "tanor" didnt think it was "efficient".
He loved coming over and playing,I gave up many a kara spot so he could do his speed runs on the cave of kobalds. Becuse when it all came down to it those epics were just purple pixels on a screen and my nephews smile will forever be in my memory and the squeel when the kobald would say"you no take my candle".
So I have taken his lock(at level 11 now and forever) and parked him on a hill looking out at the starting valley in northshire.
So to my little warlock,my nephew, my little buddy, who loved his uncle as much as his uncle loved him you will always be in my heart and that smile will always be with me."
( Read more... )
It was a tribute to "the little lock on the hill", a personal account by another warlock player 2 years ago this day (May 24 2007).
When I first read his account, I blinked, then started tearing.
This is the post the original poster, Tanorthewarlock from US Azgalor server, made on The Warlocks Den forums.
http://wowmb.net/forums/f20/15342-my_li
"Well...how to start? By getting to the point i guess...my nephew who is 7 years old pasted away today. As i sit the tears have already started to roll. But i wanted to tell you of his level 11 gnome warlock on my account,also on my sever.
He has spent 4 days 7 hrs and some change playing. Alot of time to be only level 11 huh? Well, the first day we played he wanted to make a toon like mine but he wanted his to be "little like him,so he made a gnome. And i was all over him the first few hours...with,"no go over here"" no, you want to wear those pants they are better than yours" " "no, the deer dont give you experence" "why are you going to kill those level 3 kobalds again?"
To which many of his answers where, " i like hearing those guys say "you no take candle" to which he would squeel. As for the pants he just didnt like them,he kept his pants he got in the begining. Said they were his lucky pants. He said his imp liked eating the deer,to which i would be like "no...they dont eat the deer".He would see how long it took him to get thru that cave of kobalds over and over and over again.
After all my "advice" and suggestion on "spell rotations" and how to use his imp effectivly, he told me that a game should be fun and everything i told him was confusing and made his head hurt.
From that day foward i let him do whatever he wanted as long as he wanted to. He loved killing kobalds, running around trees, killing cows, and playing his lock the way he wanted to,even if uncle "tanor" didnt think it was "efficient".
He loved coming over and playing,I gave up many a kara spot so he could do his speed runs on the cave of kobalds. Becuse when it all came down to it those epics were just purple pixels on a screen and my nephews smile will forever be in my memory and the squeel when the kobald would say"you no take my candle".
So I have taken his lock(at level 11 now and forever) and parked him on a hill looking out at the starting valley in northshire.
So to my little warlock,my nephew, my little buddy, who loved his uncle as much as his uncle loved him you will always be in my heart and that smile will always be with me."
( Read more... )
Link | | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend
And I shall believe...
Mar. 15th, 2009 | 04:41 am
Location: Home
Sensation: 
pensive
Audition: I Shall Believe - Sheryl Crow
Come to me now
And lay your hands over me
Even if it's a lie
Say it will be alright
And I shall believe
I'm broken in two
And I know you're on to me
That I only come home
When I'm so all alone
But I do believe
That not everything is gonna be the way
You think it ought to be
It seems like every time I try to make it right
It all comes down on me
Please say honestly you won't give up on me
And I shall believe
And I shall believe
Open the door
And show me your face tonight
I know it's true
No one heals me like you
And you hold the key
Never again
would I turn away from you
I'm so heavy tonight
But your love is alright
And I do believe
That not everything is gonna be the way
You think it ought to be
It seems like every time I try to make it right
It all comes down on me
Please say honestly
You won't give up on me
And I shall believe
I shall believe
And I shall believe